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Christmas Gifts

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Oversized Tee 4 Pack: Black, Charcoal, Natural, White

model-S

Threadheads Essentials

Oversized Tee 4 Pack: Black, Charcoal, Natural, White

Sale price$115.00

Regular price$165.00

Bootleg Oversized Tee Custom Oversized Tee

Threadheads Custom

Bootleg Oversized Tee

Sale price$51.00

White Black Natural Charcoal +5

Save 35%

Oversized Tee 5 Pack: Black, White

model-M

Threadheads Essentials

Oversized Tee 5 Pack: Black, White

Sale price$133.00

Regular price$206.00

Custom Bootleg Tee Custom Tee

Threadheads Custom

Custom Bootleg Tee

Sale price$42.00

Black White Pink Natural +8

Dog Bootleg Tee Custom Tee

Threadheads Custom

Dog Bootleg Tee

Sale price$42.00

Natural Pink Navy Black +2

Save 21%

Classic Tee 3-Pack: Black, Charcoal, White

model-L

Threadheads Essentials

Classic Tee 3-Pack: Black, Charcoal, White

Sale price$77.00

Regular price$97.00

Alpha Male T-Shirt

Alpha Male T-Shirt

Threadheads Originals

Alpha Male T-Shirt

Sale price$46.00

Natural Black White Charcoal

Save 32%

Classic Tee 5-Pack: Brown, Navy, Charcoal, Pale Blue, White

model-M

Threadheads Essentials

Classic Tee 5-Pack: Brown, Navy, Charcoal, Pale Blue, White

Sale price$110.00

Regular price$161.00

Pickle Slut Socks

Pickle Slut Socks

Threadheads Originals

Pickle Slut Socks

Sale price$14.00

Bootleg Wash Tee Custom Wash Tee

Threadheads Custom

Bootleg Wash Tee

Sale price$51.00

Black Stone Grey Stone

Save 32%

Classic Tee 5-Pack: Black, Brown, Charcoal, Navy, White

model-S

Threadheads Essentials

Classic Tee 5-Pack: Black, Brown, Charcoal, Navy, White

Sale price$110.00

Regular price$161.00

Alpha Male Oversized Tee

Alpha Male Oversized Tee

Threadheads Originals

Alpha Male Oversized Tee

Sale price$55.00

Charcoal Black Natural White +1

Save 30%

Oversized Tee 4 Pack: Charcoal, Black, Powder Blue, White

model-S

Threadheads Essentials

Oversized Tee 4 Pack: Charcoal, Black, Powder Blue, White

Sale price$115.00

Regular price$165.00

Cat Bootleg Tee Custom Tee

Threadheads Custom

Cat Bootleg Tee

Sale price$42.00

Yellow Black White Natural +3

Save 30%

Oversized Tee 4 Pack: Charcoal, Black, Brown, Powder Blue

model-S

Threadheads Essentials

Oversized Tee 4 Pack: Charcoal, Black, Brown, Powder Blue

Sale price$115.00

Regular price$165.00

Save 20%

Wash Tee 2 Pack: Black Stone, Grey Stone

model-L

Threadheads Essentials

Wash Tee 2 Pack: Black Stone, Grey Stone

Sale price$66.00

Regular price$83.00

Bootleg Kids Tee Custom Kids Tee

Threadheads Custom

Bootleg Kids Tee

Sale price$33.00

White Black Navy Yellow +3

Goose Knife Socks

Goose Knife Socks

Threadheads Originals

Goose Knife Socks

Sale price$14.00

Save 20%

Oversized Tee 2-Pack: Black, White

model-M

Threadheads Essentials

Oversized Tee 2-Pack: Black, White

Sale price$66.00

Regular price$83.00

Bert And Ernie Driving Me Bananas Oversized Tee Australia Online Threadheads

Bert And Ernie Driving Me Bananas Oversized Tee Australia Online Threadheads

Bert And Ernie Driving Me Bananas Oversized Tee

Sale price$55.00

Powder Blue Lilac White Natural +1

Sold out

Cunt Socks Australia Online

Cunt Socks Australia Online

Threadheads Originals

Sale price$14.00

Among the Daisies Front and Back Oversized Tee

Among the Daisies Front and Back Oversized Tee

Among the Daisies Front and Back Oversized Tee

Sale price$55.00

Natural Black

Monstars '96 Wash Tee Australia

Monstars '96 Wash Tee Australia

Monstars '96 Oversized Tee

Sale price$55.00

Black Black Stone Grey Stone

Kaiju Stripes Socks

Kaiju Stripes Socks

Threadheads Originals

Kaiju Stripes Socks

Sale price$14.00

Bootleg Hoodie Custom Hoodie

Threadheads Custom

Sale price$74.00

Natural Black Charcoal

This is Democracy Manifest T-Shirt Australia Online

Threadheads Originals

This is Democracy Manifest T-Shirt

Sale price$46.00

Natural Black White Pale Blue +1

Chick Knife Socks Australia Online

Chick Knife Socks Australia Online

Threadheads Originals

Chick Knife Socks

Sale price$14.00

Save 18%

Collegiate Striped Socks Bundle

Collegiate Striped Socks Bundle

Threadheads Essentials

Collegiate Striped Socks Bundle

Sale price$23.00

Regular price$28.00

The Pickles T-Shirt Australia Online

Threadheads Originals

The Pickles T-Shirt

Sale price$46.00

White Black Natural Yellow

Ketamine T-Shirt

Threadheads Originals

Ketamine T-Shirt

Sale price$46.00

Black Brown White Natural

Ruh-Roh Wash Tee

Ruh-Roh Wash Tee

Ruh-Roh Oversized Tee

Sale price$55.00

Black White Natural Black Stone

Save 18%

Black Socks Bundle

Black Socks Bundle

Threadheads Essentials

Black Socks Bundle

Sale price$23.00

Regular price$28.00

Man I Love Frogs Oversized Tee

Threadheads Originals

Man I Love Frogs Oversized Tee

Sale price$55.00

Natural White Black Powder Blue +3

Man I Love Frogs T-Shirt Australia Online

Threadheads Originals

Man I Love Frogs T-Shirt

Sale price$46.00

Natural Black White Black Ringer

Among the Daisies Black T-Shirt

Among the Daisies Black T-Shirt

Among the Daisies Front and Back T-Shirt

Sale price$46.00

Black White

Another Fine Day T-Shirt Australia Online

Another Fine Day T-Shirt Australia Online

Threadheads Originals

Another Fine Day T-Shirt

Sale price$46.00

Natural Black White Pink +1

Ketamine Oversized Tee

Threadheads Originals

Ketamine Oversized Tee

Sale price$55.00

Lilac Brown Black White +1

Another Fine Day Oversized Tee Australia Online Threadheads

Another Fine Day Oversized Tee Australia Online Threadheads

Threadheads Originals

Another Fine Day Oversized Tee

Sale price$55.00

Brown Natural Charcoal Powder Blue +2

Gandalf the White Oversized Tee

The Lord of the Rings

Gandalf the White Oversized Tee

Sale price$55.00

Black Stone Black White

123 Sesame St Oversized Tee Australia Online Threadheads

123 Sesame St Oversized Tee

Sale price$55.00

Lilac Natural Powder Blue White

Negroni T-Shirt Australia Online

Negroni T-Shirt Australia Online

Negroni T-Shirt

Sale price$46.00

White Natural Red Ringer

Sold out

Pussy Wagon Air Freshener Australia Online

Pussy Wagon Air Freshener Australia Online

Threadheads Originals

Pussy Wagon Air Freshener

Sale price$6.00

model-L

model-S

Threadheads Essentials

Sale price$65.00

Charcoal Natural Black

Batman The Animated Series Logo T-Shirt

Sale price$46.00

Black

Cheese Slut Hat Online Australia

Threadheads Originals

Cheese Slut Hat

Sale price$37.00

Hooray for Boobies T-Shirt Australia Online

Threadheads Originals

Hooray for Boobies T-Shirt

Sale price$46.00

White Pale Blue Natural Red Ringer

Scooby-Doo Villians Wash Tee

Scooby-Doo Villains Oversized Tee

Sale price$55.00

Black Black Stone

This is Democracy Manifest Oversized Tee

Threadheads Originals

This is Democracy Manifest Oversized Tee

Sale price$55.00

Natural Black White Powder Blue +5

1 / 5 12 3…5

Do you think that when Jesus Christ was born, he knew that his birthday would be used as an excuse by more than 2 billion people to explain away their sudden chubbiness?

Or perhaps, that it would be exploited by Megacorp McMegacorps everywhere to encourage people to spend money on random gifts like a fish training kit or a 20-litre bucket of pumpkin purée? Totally not what we’re doing by selling funny Christmas tee shirts and Christmas hoodies. Absolutely, indubitably, definitely, unquestionably not. But—you’d look pretty holy in this Believe in Miracles Christmas t-shirt or this Silent Night Christmas sweater. Just sayin’, good lookin’.

Women's Christmas T-Shirts. Men's Christmas T-Shirts. It’s cheaper than Gold, Frankincense, and Myrrh.

Okay, maybe not frankincense and myrrh, but does anyone actually know what those things are? When we were doing our super important research to dream up this gibberish, we had to spend a bit of time educating ourselves on all things Christmas and Jesus. And it turns out you can purchase frankincense and myrrh essential oils on eBay.

(Yes, someone is actually paying me to learn about the cost of some obscure aromatic resin taken from trees in the Burseraceae family. And now this information has taken up some real estate in your mind, too.)

Anyhoo, it also turns out that these essential oils are great for your skin, and if we were to pivot into a skincare brand (which would definitely not be called Skinheads), we’d probably sell frankincense and myrrh.

Alright, back to Christmas sweaters, Christmas tee shirts, Christmas hoodies, and more. Why spend all your hard-earned dosh on a gold necklace for your paramour? Why not just indulge in a funny Christmas shirt or even an ugly Christmas shirt that will spur lifelong joy? Why not avoid eating two-minute noodles and moving into your parents' basement just to spoil your loved one?

These exclusive Christmas designs are looking pretty tasty now aren’t they? Tell your studmuffin to Jingle Your Balls, now.

Exclusive Christmas T-Shirt designs by Threadheads. More exclusive than a ticket to Jesus’ Baptism.

Okay, maybe we’re joking about that last sentence. We’re a pretty cool brand, and we make some of the funniest t-shirts on the internet. And even some of the rudest t-shirts on the internet. (Our mum even told us so.) But even if we decked out Jesus in the funniest Threadheads ensemble (like this Don’t Be a Cuntasaurus crop tee), we’d still miss out on a ticket to the big man’s baptism. It’s no easy task trying to impress his father. You know, God.

Anyway, if you’re reading this, it’s probably ho-ho go-time. And there’s no better way to ensure you get lots of ho-hos and ha-has than in an exclusive Christmas sweater design on the big man’s birthday. Our Threadheads men's Christmas sweaters and women’s Christmas t-shirts are designed by in-house artists that we keep locked up in our basement. (You know what Jesus said, ‘if you don’t sin, I died for nothing.’)

So. Do you really want to risk wearing the same ugly Christmas Shirt as your aunt Gladys? Exactly. You don’t. Unless you’re in a relationship with your aunt Gladys. And if you’re in a relationship with your aunt Gladys, how did you tell your parents? I’ve been trying for years.

Cool Christmas facts to talk about in your Cool but Ugly Christmas Sweater

Don’t be that person at your Christmas dinner. You know, the one dropping the same lame dad jokes about Christmas. We hate to break it to you, but no one wants to know that Santa Jaws delivers Christmas presents to sharks. Or that Santa’s favourite singer is Elf-is Presley. Stop it.

Instead, you could be dropping some Christmas knowledge bombs with these tinsel-tingling facts about that one day in December on which you end up 10x heavier.

You can thank the Dutch for feeding Santa cookies and milk. And driving up cookie and milk sales on Christmas Eve.
Some of the first artificial Christmas trees were made of goose feathers that were dyed green.
Mistletoe is considered an aphrodisiac. Hubba Hubba.
Jingle Bells is the first song played in space. Now, will you Jingle My Balls?
Rio De Janeiro set the record for the world’s largest floating Christmas tree. They must’ve been bored.

The Best Collection of Christmas Shirts since Jesus walked on Water

Forget about the moon landing. Forget about electric cars. Forget about the Oscar’s slap. Our collection of Christmas shirts are the best thing to happen since Jesus walked on water.

So, what are you waiting for?

Oh, and tell us, what do you call someone who’s afraid of Santa Clause? Claustrophobic.

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