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Salty AF Socks Australia Online

Salty AF Socks Australia Online

Threadheads Originals

Sale price$10.00

Takoyaki Kansai Street Food T-Shirt

Tokyo-Dori Studio

Takoyaki Kansai Street Food T-Shirt

Sale price$32.00

Yellow Pale Blue Grey

Sour Yet Sweet Pickles T-Shirt

Threadheads Originals

Sour Yet Sweet Pickles T-Shirt

Sale price$32.00

Red Ringer White Natural Brown +1

Save 16%

Danny Dorito T-Shirt Australia Online

Threadheads Originals

Danny Corn Chip T-Shirt

Sale price$27.00

Regular price$32.00

Black Black Ringer Natural White

Lactose Tolerant Oversized Tee

Threadheads Originals

Lactose Tolerant Oversized Tee

Sale price$38.00

Black Charcoal Grey Stone Black Stone

This is Bob T-Shirt

Threadheads Originals

This is Bob T-Shirt

Sale price$32.00

White Natural Pale Blue Navy +3

Save 16%

Stop Staring At My Tits Oversized Tee Australia Online White

Threadheads Originals

Stop Staring At My Tits Oversized Tee

Sale price$32.00

Regular price$38.00

White Black

Negroni Oversized Tee Australia Online Threadheads

Negroni Oversized Tee Australia Online Threadheads

Negroni Oversized Tee

Sale price$38.00

Natural White

Sour Yet Sweet Pickles Oversized Tee

Threadheads Originals

Sour Yet Sweet Pickles Oversized Tee

Sale price$38.00

White Natural Black Brown

I Eat Asbestos T-Shirt Australia Online

Threadheads Originals

I Eat Asbestos T-Shirt

Sale price$32.00

Black Black Ringer White Navy +1

Breakfast T-Shirt Australia Online

Threadheads Originals

Breakfast T-Shirt

Sale price$32.00

Black White Grey Black Ringer

Espresso Martini T-Shirt Australia Online

Espresso Martini T-Shirt Australia Online

Espresso Martini T-Shirt

Sale price$32.00

White Natural

Man I Love Fish Front and Back T-Shirt Australia Online

Man I Love Fish Front and Back T-Shirt Australia Online

Threadheads Originals

Man I Love Fish Front and Back T-Shirt

Sale price$32.00

Black Natural White Black Ringer

Another Fine Day Ruined by Responsibility T-Shirt Australia Online

Threadheads Originals

Another Fine Day Ruined by Responsibility T-Shirt

Sale price$32.00

Black Ringer White Black Pale Blue +1

Picolas Cage T-Shirt

Threadheads Originals

Picolas Cage T-Shirt

Sale price$32.00

Black White Natural Grey +4

Negroni Cocktail Club Oversized Tee Online Australia

Negroni Cocktail Club Oversized Tee Online Australia

Threadheads Originals

Negroni Cocktail Club Oversized Tee

Sale price$38.00

Black Charcoal White

Save 16%

Quick Animal Facts - Sharks T-Shirt Australia Online

Threadheads Originals

Quick Animal Facts - Sharks T-Shirt

Sale price$27.00

Regular price$32.00

White Black Natural

Spicy Marg Oversized Tee Online Australia

Spicy Marg Oversized Tee Online Australia

Threadheads Originals

Spicy Marg Oversized Tee

Sale price$38.00

Natural Black

Damn I Love Fish Oversized Tee

Threadheads Originals

Damn I Love Fish Oversized Tee

Sale price$38.00

White

Democracy Manifest Judo Academy T-Shirt Australia Online

Threadheads Originals

Democracy Manifest Judo Academy T-Shirt

Sale price$32.00

Black Natural White

Save 16%

Cheese Slut T-Shirt Australia Online

Threadheads Originals

Cheese Slut T-Shirt

Sale price$27.00

Regular price$32.00

Black Black Ringer Yellow Navy +3

Man I Love Fish Front and Back Oversized Tee

Man I Love Fish Front and Back Oversized Tee

Threadheads Originals

Man I Love Fish Front and Back Oversized Tee

Sale price$38.00

White Lilac Black Brown

The Great Wave of Coffee T-Shirt Australia Online

The Great Wave of Coffee T-Shirt

Sale price$32.00

Black

Problem Child Socks Australia Online

Problem Child Socks Australia Online

Threadheads Originals

Problem Child Socks

Sale price$10.00

Pickle Slut T-Shirt

Pickle Slut T-Shirt

Threadheads Originals

Pickle Slut T-Shirt

Sale price$32.00

Black White Brown Natural

Call My Lawyer T-Shirt Australia Online

Call My Lawyer T-Shirt Australia Online

Threadheads Originals

Call My Lawyer T-Shirt

Sale price$32.00

White Pale Blue

FORG T-Shirt Australia Online

Threadheads Originals

Sale price$32.00

Brown Natural Black White +2

Man I Love Frogs Front and Back T-Shirt Australia Online

Man I Love Frogs Front and Back T-Shirt Australia Online

Threadheads Originals

Man I Love Frogs Front and Back T-Shirt

Sale price$32.00

Natural Black White Black Ringer

Coffee Club White T-Shirt

Threadheads Originals

Coffee Club T-Shirt

Sale price$32.00

White Black Natural

Democracy Manifest Volume II T-Shirt Australia Online

Threadheads Originals

Democracy Manifest Volume II T-Shirt

Sale price$32.00

Black Ringer White Black Natural +3

Capybara Water Rat T-Shirt Australia Online

Threadheads Originals

Capybara Water Rat T-Shirt

Sale price$32.00

Black

Succulent Chinese Meal Socks Australia Online

Succulent Chinese Meal Socks Australia Online

Threadheads Originals

Succulent Chinese Meal Socks

Sale price$10.00

Succulent Chinese Meal Mini Print Tee Australia Online

Threadheads Originals

Succulent Chinese Meal Mini Print Tee

Sale price$32.00

White Black

NYC Slice Oversized Tee Online Australia

NYC Slice Oversized Tee Online Australia

Threadheads Originals

NYC Slice Oversized Tee

Sale price$38.00

White Black

Democracy Manifest Volume II Oversized Tee

Threadheads Originals

Democracy Manifest Volume II Oversized Tee

Sale price$38.00

Brown Natural Black White +5

Sold out

Classic Joggers #type_cuffless

Classic Joggers #type_cuffless

Threadheads Essentials

Sale price$32.00

Charcoal Black

Group Call T-Shirt Australia Online

Group Call T-Shirt Australia Online

Group Call T-Shirt

Sale price$32.00

Black White Natural

Scoliosis T-Shirt

Threadheads Originals

Scoliosis T-Shirt

Sale price$32.00

Black White

It’s All Good in the Neighborhood T-Shirt Australia

It’s All Good in the Neighborhood T-Shirt

Sale price$32.00

Black White Natural Pale Blue

Show Me Your Kitties Natural T-Shirt

Threadheads Originals

Show Me Your Kitties T-Shirt

Sale price$32.00

Natural White

Oysters, The Quiet Luxury T-Shirt Australia Online

Threadheads Originals

Oysters, The Quiet Luxury T-Shirt

Sale price$32.00

Black Navy Brown

Egg & Spoon T-Shirt

Egg & Spoon T-Shirt

Threadheads Originals

Egg & Spoon T-Shirt

Sale price$32.00

Black White

Video Games Rot Your Brains T-Shirt Australia Online

Video Games Rot Your Brains T-Shirt

Sale price$32.00

Black Natural White

MILF Fungi T-Shirt Australia Online

Threadheads Originals

MILF Fungi T-Shirt

Sale price$32.00

Black Pale Blue Black Ringer White +1

Big Red Outback Heavyweight Oversized Tee Online Australia

Big Red Outback Heavyweight Oversized Tee Online Australia

Threadheads Originals

Big Red Outback Heavyweight Oversized Tee

Sale price$38.00

Natural

Succulent Christmas Meal T-Shirt

Threadheads Originals

Succulent Christmas Meal T-Shirt

Sale price$32.00

Black White Grey Charcoal

I Hate It Here T-Shirt

I Hate It Here T-Shirt

I Hate It Here T-Shirt

Sale price$32.00

Natural Black White Red Ringer

Nakatomi Christmas Party 1988 T-Shirt

Threadheads Originals

Nakatomi Christmas Party 1988 T-Shirt

Sale price$32.00

Black Red White Green

Do you think that when Jesus Christ was born, he knew that his birthday would be used as an excuse by more than 2 billion people to explain away their sudden chubbiness?

Or perhaps, that it would be exploited by Megacorp McMegacorps everywhere to encourage people to spend money on random gifts like a fish training kit or a 20-litre bucket of pumpkin purée? Totally not what we’re doing by selling funny Christmas tee shirts and Christmas hoodies. Absolutely, indubitably, definitely, unquestionably not. But—you’d look pretty holy in this Believe in Miracles Christmas t-shirt or this Silent Night Christmas sweater. Just sayin’, good lookin’.

Women's Christmas T-Shirts. Men's Christmas T-Shirts. It’s cheaper than Gold, Frankincense, and Myrrh.

Okay, maybe not frankincense and myrrh, but does anyone actually know what those things are? When we were doing our super important research to dream up this gibberish, we had to spend a bit of time educating ourselves on all things Christmas and Jesus. And it turns out you can purchase frankincense and myrrh essential oils on eBay.

(Yes, someone is actually paying me to learn about the cost of some obscure aromatic resin taken from trees in the Burseraceae family. And now this information has taken up some real estate in your mind, too.)

Anyhoo, it also turns out that these essential oils are great for your skin, and if we were to pivot into a skincare brand (which would definitely not be called Skinheads), we’d probably sell frankincense and myrrh.

Alright, back to Christmas sweaters, Christmas tee shirts, Christmas hoodies, and more. Why spend all your hard-earned dosh on a gold necklace for your paramour? Why not just indulge in a funny Christmas shirt or even an ugly Christmas shirt that will spur lifelong joy? Why not avoid eating two-minute noodles and moving into your parents' basement just to spoil your loved one?

These exclusive Christmas designs are looking pretty tasty now aren’t they? Tell your studmuffin to Jingle Your Balls, now.

Exclusive Christmas T-Shirt designs by Threadheads. More exclusive than a ticket to Jesus’ Baptism.

Okay, maybe we’re joking about that last sentence. We’re a pretty cool brand, and we make some of the funniest t-shirts on the internet. And even some of the rudest t-shirts on the internet. (Our mum even told us so.) But even if we decked out Jesus in the funniest Threadheads ensemble (like this Don’t Be a Cuntasaurus crop tee), we’d still miss out on a ticket to the big man’s baptism. It’s no easy task trying to impress his father. You know, God.

Anyway, if you’re reading this, it’s probably ho-ho go-time. And there’s no better way to ensure you get lots of ho-hos and ha-has than in an exclusive Christmas sweater design on the big man’s birthday. Our Threadheads men's Christmas sweaters and women’s Christmas t-shirts are designed by in-house artists that we keep locked up in our basement. (You know what Jesus said, ‘if you don’t sin, I died for nothing.’)

So. Do you really want to risk wearing the same ugly Christmas Shirt as your aunt Gladys? Exactly. You don’t. Unless you’re in a relationship with your aunt Gladys. And if you’re in a relationship with your aunt Gladys, how did you tell your parents? I’ve been trying for years.

Cool Christmas facts to talk about in your Cool but Ugly Christmas Sweater

Don’t be that person at your Christmas dinner. You know, the one dropping the same lame dad jokes about Christmas. We hate to break it to you, but no one wants to know that Santa Jaws delivers Christmas presents to sharks. Or that Santa’s favourite singer is Elf-is Presley. Stop it.

Instead, you could be dropping some Christmas knowledge bombs with these tinsel-tingling facts about that one day in December on which you end up 10x heavier.

You can thank the Dutch for feeding Santa cookies and milk. And driving up cookie and milk sales on Christmas Eve.
Some of the first artificial Christmas trees were made of goose feathers that were dyed green.
Mistletoe is considered an aphrodisiac. Hubba Hubba.
Jingle Bells is the first song played in space. Now, will you Jingle My Balls?
Rio De Janeiro set the record for the world’s largest floating Christmas tree. They must’ve been bored.

The Best Collection of Christmas Shirts since Jesus walked on Water

Forget about the moon landing. Forget about electric cars. Forget about the Oscar’s slap. Our collection of Christmas shirts are the best thing to happen since Jesus walked on water.

So, what are you waiting for?

Oh, and tell us, what do you call someone who’s afraid of Santa Clause? Claustrophobic.

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